10/11/12

Today is 10/11/12!!! 

Special date? 

If my friend and sister never remind me, I wouldn't even notice this. It seems like every year will have such special date to be significant to people. I only know this will be the memorable date for Dato Lee Chong Wei as he having his wedding today (info also gained from friend and internet). But for me, it is just another normal day.I still not forget last year's 11/11/11 where you can find this in my blog, the date I went to attend my close friend's funeral. Time really flies. Tomorrow I going to attend his one year anniversary prayer. Every time I rethink back the incident happened on him, I feel life so fragile and unpredictable. We should appreciate every single day, hour, minute and second we have now. I told myself not to waste time being down, thinking of nonsense or take things so seriously. But somehow, emotion is always there which is uncontrollable for me. Uncontrollable not only on my emotion but also to my decision. I decided to get myself a new smartphone and uncontrollably I bought a SAMSUNG GALAXY NOTE 2 immediately for not thinking whether I have enough $$ or not. Consequences, I loaned some part of the $$ from my mum (people who always pampersupport me in everything I demanded). As mentioned, I "LOANED" not ask for free. Thinking I won't pay back? Very sorry, I am not that kind of spoiled kid. I will have my things using my own ability not depending on parents especially who had retired since I entered uni.

Last Thursday, I went to place my deposit for the work and travel for summer 2013. Again, $$ needed. Once deposit paid, there will be no way back as I wouldn't let my $$ be thrown into the sea and I also never thought not to join unless the Dec 2012 is the real for END OF THE WORLD. Haha. Seriously got myself a VERY HUGE HOLE inside my purse. After talking to the agent face-to-face and planned with my friend the places to visit in USA, I getting more and more excited and wish the date to USA to arrive immediately now. Thinking I could explore USA next year which will be opened up my view to the world and taste the fullness of life brings me more excitement. Well, enough of this or else I don't know how to continue with my assignments and reading for my coming tests. Test 2 coming soon and test again!! Overall test 1 result was quite outstanding for my own standard. Never thought of it. But this only happened once, means only this time after being in uni for three years plus. I don't think it will happen for coming test. Anyway, is time to SHOW OFF. LOL

 My new smartphone!!

SAMSUNG GALAXY NOTE 2!!

DEPOSIT PAID!!

Both of these yielded THIS...

Emo week

After being emo for almost a week, I guess now is the time for me to tune the channel back to normal. Seriously, emo did not yield me anything other than being down for these days. But why I still can emo for so many days? Because it was out of my control. I keep persuading myself not to think about my FYP problem, but it seems like haunting me by popping out in my mind at every interval of time. DAMN IT.  I am tired. Very tired. If this gonna continues until my final year ends, I guess I will be dying at the same time. Arrgghhh. Enough of that. Actually now I am still not fully back to the normal channel but I am trying hard to do so. Trying to comfort myself by telling "may be she not that hard to be communicate with? or may be she had arranged things well for us? or may be she will not suffer me that terrible? etc etc.. " Friends always said things come and solve. I know and understand as well. BUT, no one will understand my situation when dealing with her. When I see her face, my heart shivered!! Because I do not know when I will say out something that not match with her picky ears. I guessed I will continue complaining in my blog until this end may be. I hope I could be strong enough to deal with coming obstacles that she will bring me. Or may be she will treat me well then I will have happy blog title here then.

Time flies

Well, time flies. Now already week 4 and next week will be the week 5 where I will have my Test 1 from Monday until Wednesday. After months, never have test feel so hard to focus on my notes. Besides that, getting more and more assignments and reports stacked in my "to do" list. But still, I am loitering around sometimes. Thinking to work seriously hard to try to get my first class honor back or not sometimes.Of course I wish to have it, but wish is always wish not necessary I can make it even if I really put in effort. My blog now seem to be a place for me to share out my sorrow/complain more than joy. Compared to my previous blog, I will always share all the joys and fun I had in my life with photos. WHY IT IS SO?? Last time I like the "happy go lucky" phrase. Yet now, seem like not existing in my life.

Endless Problem...

Seriously fed up with the school/ university life where I need to base on someone to get survive for my future. My XX always makes my life miserable. From the day I entered uni, every single semester, XX never fail to throw tantrums on me!! Only once, XX smiled at me!! ONCE!! This time was the worst one. The incident happened yesterday until now I still feel uneasy! My heart weights a ton! I keep telling myself to be optimistic and since now I can't do anything to change it why not just accept it? I feel I'm so weak mentally. Pray hard I could do my FYP smoothly without affecting my work and travel plan. I just want to be free from education's cage. Many people told me working life is not as good as I thought. I understand but at least I don't need to base on anyone to get survive. If my boss really makes me very miserable, I can just quit it! No big deal. Of course, I meant is when it really necessary for me to quit not just simply quit for small matter. But in school or uni, you think you can just quit? NO WAY!! I want to have my degree certification! That's all!!

Things come and solve

It is true that things come and solve. My course registration problem had finally solved and it turn up from the worst to the best result. I get to be in the same lab with my friends. I'm not going to be alone and the grouping was well arranged too. But problems always there, next will be my fyp supervisor. I wonder my PA will be my supervisor or I need to get another lecturer. After weeks of holiday vacations, now back to reality. Feel so bored and tired. Not willing to work for my final year yet.

Undefined feeling

Again I faced problem with my course registration. And this time I do not know it is a good or bad thing to have such decision. Now I have the same lab time with my friends, but different group. So the good thing is I have the same free day as my friends. But the problem now is I do not know who else will be my lab mate. Is there any Chinese in? Or I am the only one there? Oh God!!

I know I should not think so much as I could not predict or know the answer right now. I already keep telling myself not to think about it just enjoy the rest of my wonderful holiday now. But again, thing is easy to say than done. Due to my personality, it seem a bit tough for me not think about it. I never fail to look at esmp everyday whenever I online. This is to update myself for the course registration especially the PD subject. I wish one day I could see *miracle* on it.

And this course registration problem make me feel regret being in local uni. I faced this prob since Sem 2 Year 1. I seriously get fed up with it. I always ask myself why not to choose to be a pharmacist!! If I could stand on it, I will not be in local!! And why not I request to go oversea for my studies?? Then, I could have more life experience I guess.

Well, there is no IF and IF and IF. Haha. So better stop mumbling. Life goes on no matter how. Learning to be tough and accept the fact although the fact is always cruel.

Hope that taken away~

Imagine today just a normal day like usual, but out of a sudden you receive a call saying that you won RM 1, 000, 000 (of course is not a scam) from a lucky draw. Then, they said they will be sending you a bank cheque by this afternoon and will give you a call when they are about to do it. So, your feeling now is really delighted and excited until you got the "light" feeling on your body mass where you feel you are like floating or flying in the air. LOL

Just like these~ HAHAHAHA

And for sure, you will be thinking the way of spending it by getting all the high technology gadgets and the luxury stuffs. So, you wait for time to come patiently and now it comes where you again receive the call from the same number. You picked up the phone and the same person told you," Hi Ms. X, sorry to inform you that we made a mistake as you may not be the winner for our lucky draw. We will have further investigation and back to you soon. Sorry. Bye." You are now stunted and seem like everything you thought before this all gone. Your heart is now broken into pieces, ~ping piang~

From this, what you see? The message I would like to deliver here is "Do not give any hope to people if you cannot be sure you can make it". Of course, the real story I experienced today not as the above story. But I am writing it out not meant to blame the person here, just to share out the thing I see and learn for today. Now, I am learning to see the positive parts of each happening and stop complaining about the bad or negative as I could not change it. 

Fishing needs patience~

   

Remember this??

Fishing game~

Bought this for my niece in Toy City, The Mines when I back to UPM for Hep B injection and to take the allowance claim forms. Yesterday I played with my niece and I realized this helps to train my patience as the plate keep turning and you need to be very focus and quick if you wanna get the fish!!! This tells me same goes to life. Need to be patience to wait for opportunity and grab it in hand once it comes. But for me to be patience is really hard to be done. I seriously lack of patience. Just like recently I had my course registration and due to my "superb concern" PA late account activation, I am left out at group 2 (Thurs whole day lab) for a course where all my friends (my gang) registered under group 1 (Tues whole day lab). And because of my impatience, I keep on disturbed my friends and coursemates. I felt so sorry to disturb them but I really run out of idea on solving it as I had already asked the malay coursemates see whether there will be chances for me to squeeze into group 1 or not but ended up the answer was NO! 

I had worried this matter for 3-4 days and keep on asking my gang of friends whether they want to change to group 2 or not. But ended up some of them do not response even they saw it. I feel very down. I know I am selfish because 9 of them already in group 1 and I am the only one in group 2. I should not ask them to be so sacrificed. I can't blame anyone as this is my own problem and I should solve it myself. So, I start to tell myself let go and let it be. I guess it would be a way for me to learn how to overcome my loneliness when my friends are not around me, learn to be alone in doing anything in uni and not to be so playful whenever I am free. Due to the free day we have will be different, so I could not join them for any outing and this is the main reason I disturbed them for the group changing. I also not sure this time my impatience is related to my babysitter job at home or not because my parents went travel and I need to help my sister to take care of her two little monsters. Taking care of kid and baby is really not an easy job. They are somehow annoying especially when you are having your own problems. But now, I feel much better and rethink back why I so impatience. I just can wait and see how for now. Nothing much I can do now I guessed as the things I should do already done. But I still waiting for a reply or may be a miracle or even a hope for my friends to change. Life should be full with hopes. *PRAY HARD*

The truth after 3 months intern..

After had my intern for 3 months plus, I realized the company not as bad as I thought before this. I had a bad image on this company just because I heard a lot of unreasonable rules which I was told by someone (A) before entering it. Well, for the DON'Tss listed before this it do exist just in certain cases. But still, I feel bad that I am not given the Sat off as I think trainee does deserve the one day off for one month. I had understood all these from yesterday lunch time where I had my lunch with my supervisor and production manager. We chatted and then only I found out most of unreasonable rules are reasonable. For instance, the rule saying do not back home sharp at 5pm just apply if you have not finish doing your work. My supervisor said A does not follow up the work she in charge of and back home. So, surely will be scolded. My supervisor asked me, "You see. You also back home sharp at 5pm but do you get scold?". Erm, true also as I started to back sharp at 5pm since 2nd month of working but I am not scolded by anyone. After the chat, my supervisor had almost explained all the unreasonable rules by telling me the background stories. The lesson I gained from this is do not just listen to people before experienced it yourself. Different people will come out with different outcome. And this is the best example as A and I are totally different in attitude and etc so what we feel and get also different. My supervisor even said to me, "You go back and tell A that whatever bad's she got from here do not happened on you". LOL. My supervisor so bad right? But she is a kind lady actually. I do not really know what A did until my supervisor said so. 

My supervisor even asked me to promote this company to my juniors so they can have trainee. But frankly to say that, this company is not bad just the top management person's is not really good in managing. Have you ever seen a top management person SHOUTING and using a ruler beating the table LOUDLY until the whole office heard it?? This happened in my place. I never ever thought SHOUTING and BEATING the table using RULER is one of the way of management. I thought this will only happened at home when facing the children. OMG!! The voice is so damn annoying as I am thinking and doing my LI report. Besides the top management person, some AUNTIES there are too annoying. When they very "pek chek" with their works and when I need to do printing using AUNTY's printer, I will be scolded as she said "AIYO, YOU DID NOT SEE I USING IT MEH? YOU SEE NOW, WASTED MY LETTER HEAD PAPER". WTx. My place is at the back and her sit is at the front which is few rows from mine. So, how I can notice whether she using or not. Fine, from that day onward I walk to her place and see whether she using or not before I click print. I always remind myself not to repeat the same mistake for twice and I must do it because I feel annoyed when people scold me. You may think I'm so "siao jie" cannot be scolded. Ya, may be I am. There is also an aunty who always speaks out without thinking twice using her brain and always hurt people by her words. I also kena from her. But I do not really remember what was that. And she so damn kepo. Keep on asking me, you taking your hp playing FB ar? Even I really playing FB, I also won't tell you lo. So damn stupid. Haiz. So, if junior really ask me about this company I will just tell the truth.

KLCC Jalan-jalan & Makan-makan..

After one month plus intern, this was the first time (18 Mar) I stepped back to KL area ... My mission was to HUNT FOR FOODS and mum & sis were to "LOOK" for branded handbag.. Just "LOOK" only not buying it.. Because mum going to Eastern Europe on May, so she want to compare the price.. Hehe..

Here we come, KLCC!!!

Lunch at Charlie Brown Cafe..

Soh nini with Charlie Brown..

Snoopy hot chocolate.. Its cute but kinda sweet..

My mum, sis & me..
(Foods- So so only.. 6.5/10)

After lunch, we went for window shopping for LV, Gucci, Prada, Burberry, Coach, etc.. Then.. ended with desserts~

Durian puffs & durian pancakes~
YES!! WE ARE DURIAN'S LOVER~
LOL
(Durian puffs- 8/10 & Durian Pancakes Musang King- awesome 10/10)

Creme Brulee & Durian Snow Blend at Tong Pak Fu!!!
Again, DURIAN~
(Creme brulee- so so only 5.5/10.. Durian Snow Blend- nice but not awesome yet 8/10)

Soh nini at Candylicious..

SPM result???

SPM result released today.. For me, my SPM seem to be N-years ago.. Now, I'm 23 years old.. So my SPM was on 2007.. OMG.. Already 5 years ago.. I was thinking if I could back to that how good.. I might not be having this pathway right now.. My SPM result was 9As' 2Bs'.. Although not straight As' but I never use it to apply any scholarship or even matrix.. So dumb.. That time still "young" don't know what to choose for future.. Worried will regret after making decision.. So went for Form 6.. Then after Form 6, get into one of the choices.. So just go for it.. Sometimes, I blame myself why I can't made up my mind to choose one?? Why I can't stand for one?? When I was Form 2, I thought of being a lawyer (influenced by my friend and also HK series).. Then when I ended my SPM, I thought of being a pharmacist and even doctor also.. But now, I ended up with Food Science & Technology.. Haiz.. Speechless on myself...

My SHORT HAIR with my NERD SPEC!!!

After 2 months long never cut my hair.. Now is the time to cut it!!!

Before cut.. From this, into...

THIS!!!
So damn short!!!
And totally different than the hairstyle I want to cut!!!
Arrrggghhhh!!!

The DON'Tsss...

1. Do not "berkira" in all aspect..
2. Do not back sharp at 5pm..
3. Do not eat at pantry due to the foods' smell will spread off to the office..
4. Do not do anything without informing 'A' even photocopied the punch card..
   
5. Do not go back without informing 'A'..
6. Do not make the toilet smelly..
7. Do not get pregnant..
   
8. Do not write scientific term in your report..
9. Do not talk non work related topic and read newspaper even u finish ur work..
   

Although the DON'Tsss listed not exceed 10, somehow I feel majority of it are unreasonable..

First DON'T- At first I agreed with it because as an intern student, I should learn doing everything. But after one month, I feel that was rubbish. You asked people not to "kira", but ended up I think you are the most "BERKIRA" one. Every female management staffs deserved one Sat off each month, but DO I GET THE SAME TREAT? Just half day off on Sat once a month, you also cannot make it for me? WHO BERKIRA NOW? I am trainee but I deserved the same lo.

Second DON'T- This one I feel acceptable as every boss also hopes their workers to work hard for them. But the problem is I have finished all my work everyday before 5pm and I never make myself punch card at 5pm. I always back around 5.10pm to 5.15pm. But I guess, you will only want me to back at 5.30pm or even later. Please be considerate, from company to my house it takes me 30-40mins.

Third DON'T- This is not reasonable at all. Why can't eat at pantry and must not let the office have the foods' smell? Then for what having the pantry with microwave?

Fourth and Fifth DON'T- Both unreasonable one. I photocopied the punch card just a procedure needed by my uni and I had informed my supervisor. Such little thing also need to inform u? I guess u too free already. Go back also need to inform u? I already informed my supervisor. Inform to show appreciation. What shit theory it is??

Sixth DON'T- Whose shit and urine not smelly? =.=

Seventh DON'T- Just because you don't like baby and so had such DON'T listed. What nonsense!!

Eighth DON'T- The report I doing now obviously do not need a degree holder of Bac. Food Science and Tech to do. It is just a waste.

Ninth DON'T- 'A' keep on talking nonsense and read newspaper in the morning are DO in 'A' list but DON'T for the rest. Well, what to do? 'A' is in the top management. Speechless.

All these I knew by absorbing from surrounding and informed by someone in the office. I still not call into her room to face the music yet by the above DON'Tsss. But I guess, it will be soon. And now I know why everyone pushing themselves hard to the top just because being the top management one, no matter what you said it will be a theory for others to follow even though everyone know it is not logic at all.

Temporary official working life..

Started my internship.. Today is the second day.. But I already can feel the tiredness of working as what my working friends told me last time.. Need to wake up early... Then face the traffic jam.. Plus my job include running up and down to the production line and also office.. OMG!!! I used to prefer working than study before this.. But now.. I guess I wish to back study.. Because study I don't need to wake up so early, having such long hours outside, face traffic jam, etc.. I don't know issit this job or factory made me feel so or what.. But I guess if I get to do my intern in a place where there will be other intern students like me, I will not say so.. Because as long as I got friend, I will not feel bored or strange.. This factory mostly also female Chinese in the office.. And they all are "aunty" level already.. OMG!! Telling things like cooking all that.. I'm not interested at all!!! Moreover got people told me how scary is the 'A' and is vr "yim chim".. Everyone will have the "chance" to get into the room to be "lectured".. Don't know when will be my turn to personally call into the room to receive the "lecture".. Sigh.. Anyhow, I wish to go through this 6months internship in this company smoothly..

*PRAY HARD*

CNY holiday...

Today is the 9th day of CNY.. My holiday gonna end in few hours time.. Tomorrow gonna start my internship.. Have to get myself adapt to the new environment, new people, new lifestyle, etc.. But luckily I'm still at my own hometown.. So, I guess it would be slightly better as after 5pm I will be back to my home sweet home and rest.. And for weekend, I still can have my time with my family and friends..

For this CNY, I really spent it to the max.. From day 1 to day 7, it was full with activities as follow..

Day 1
Visit Ah Ma & aunty.. (a bit boring at aunty's house)

The day I got those BIG angpau (fr parents & sis)

Day 2
Went to cousin's house and went to Temple of Lights - FGS Dong Zen Temple at the evening

Camwhore while waiting for bro before leaving to temple..

Happy Dragon Year~

Lighting at the temple..

Day 3
Whole day outing with my form 6 friends

5 of us at Tutti Frutti~

Day 4
Went to Jusco Bukit Tinggi to meet my sis and have a reunion dinner with bro in law's family

Part of the dishes.. Mini abalone for dinner..

Day 5
Day with no photo taken.. I woke up at 1pm.. LOL.. Played mahjong with my parents.. At night cousin came to my house

Day 6

Went Midvalley to meet my secondary friends.. Continued our day at Jusco Cheras Selatan

4 of us.. Lunch at Fong Lye Restaurant, The Garden..

Day 7
Sudden plan and went to KLCC with my sis, bro in law & cutie nini

KLCC~

Aquaria KLCC~

Last day of 2011...

Today is the last day of 2011.. And now left less than 2 hours to 2012..

How do you celebrate it??

With champagne??

Or with firework??

I have an unique one this year...
WITH MY NOTES!!!!

LOL.. Don't get me wrong.. Not this $$$ note..

THIS IS THE ONE I REFERRING!!!!
LECTURE'S NOTES!!!

Anyway, I wish everyone a HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
Say GOODBYE to the PASS and WELCOME the GREAT FUTURE of 2012!!!

Study week...

Currently, I'm having my study week.. First time having study week on Christmas and New Year.. The feeling was really bad.. Seeing people celebrating but I'm not.. But there are also people who are having study week like me and they seem like having fun not just for few hours but for days as they are going elsewhere.. This make me having a lot of QUESTION MARKsss in my mind..

Why they can have such activity but I do not allow myself to have one??
I'm too stress?? Too care?? Too stupid?? Too control of myself??
OR..
They are too free?? Don't bother?? Well prepared??

Sick + warmed..

I'm sick again~
I don't know how many times I fall sick in a year~
When I fall sick, my mum will keep saying "ah, don't want drink water la.. now, only keep on drinking LITERS of water.."
HAHAHA..
I guess friends who are close to me also know I can drink not more than 500ml of water a day..
So this week, due to my sickness, my dearest pama fetch me back to uni because they said I ate the medicine already so blur blur, better don't drive..
Thanks pama~
Thanks for pampering me~
Although I got no car to drive this week, I felt so warmed now~
I love both of you, pama!!!
♥♥♥

Life...

“Life is an opportunity, benefit from it.
Life is beauty, admire it.
Life is a dream, realize it.
Life is a challenge, meet it.
Life is a duty, complete it.
Life is a game, play it.
Life is a promise, fulfill it.
Life is sorrow, overcome it.
Life is a song, sing it.
Life is a struggle, accept it.
Life is a tragedy, confront it.
Life is an adventure, dare it.
Life is luck, make it.
Life is too precious, do not destroy it.
Life is life, fight for it.”
by Mother Teresa

From the above, I understand whatever life is.. Just do it as it is..

"We can only have "them" as our family now..
We can only have "them" as our friends now..
And we can only have one life in our lifetime now..
So treasure "them" as you can..

We might only face the obstacles in this life and not other..
We might only have the happiness in this life and not other..
So hold "them" strong as you can.."
by PYY (me~)

LOL.. Just some lousy phrases from me... :p

Untitled post...

Don't know what to write here.. But feel like writing.. I also don't know what happened on me.. Just emotionally unstable recently.. This is due to overstress by the tests I having now.. I worried a lot on my results, worrying the grade I get that will affect my gpa and cgpa which will eventually cause me unable to graduate with the min cpga I aimed.. Sound stupid right?? What for think so much?? LET IT BE!! But thing always easy to say than done.. This time I seriously failed to apply it.. Isn't I have some mental problems?? Or hormones imbalance?? LOL... I don't know.. Anyhow, tomorrow I will sit for my FIRST OPEN BOOK TEST, FOOD LAW!!!

This is the book I'm allowed to bring in..
But honestly, I again worried.. Because the lecturer did not really tell us the format and just said there will be 4Q wit 20m each.. And I required to write ESSAY where the answers cannot get just by referring this book!!! GOSH......